When Officers Don’t Ask for Help: Changing the Culture of Silence

Part II: How do We Change the Culture?

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Changing a culture that historically discourages help-seeking requires more than telling officers to “take care of themselves.” Leadership must demonstrate, in several ways, that asking for help is acceptable:

1. Make help easy to find

If an officer has to search through a policy manual, call three people, or explain his or her situation to multiple supervisors just to find out what resources are available, many will give up. Departments should make resources clear and accessible. Officers should know:

• Who they can contact
• What services are available
• What is confidential and what is not
• What happens after they ask for help
• Whether peer support, counseling, or other resources are available
• What options exist for temporary assistance when someone is struggling

The fewer barriers, the more likely officers are to use the resources.

2. Separate support from discipline

An officer asking for help should not automatically be treated as an administrative problem. That doesn't mean departments should ignore legitimate safety or performance concerns. It means agencies should distinguish between an officer seeking support and an officer who has violated policy or poses an immediate safety risk. Those are not automatically the same thing.

3. Build peer support into the culture

Sometimes an officer won't walk into a counselor's office—but will talk to another cop. Peer support programs can help bridge that gap. The person offering support doesn't need to have every answer. Sometimes the most valuable thing a peer can say is, “I've been there. You don't have to handle this alone.” Peer-support programs should be properly trained, trusted, and connected to appropriate professional resources.

4. Stop waiting for the crisis

Agencies should normalize conversations about wellness before something goes wrong. After a particularly difficult call, checking in with an officer shouldn't be unusual. After a critical incident, follow-up shouldn't end when the paperwork is finished. Supervisors can and should make some simple questions routine:

“How are you doing?”

“How did that call affect you?”

“Do you need anything?”

And most importantly, they need to actually listen to the answers.

The Badge Doesn't Make Someone Invincible

Police officers are expected to protect others, but they are not immune to the experiences they encounter. They have families. They experience grief. They get overwhelmed. They struggle with relationships. They experience trauma. They become exhausted. They have bad days. Sometimes they need professional help. None of that erases their commitment to the job. The strongest police organizations will be the ones that understand this.

We should stop asking officers only, “Can you handle it?” We should also ask, “What do you need?” Those two questions are not opposites. In fact, asking the second may help an officer continue doing the first.

Changing police culture won't happen because of one wellness program, one training session, or one policy. It will happen when supervisors demonstrate vulnerability, peers look out for one another, departments protect appropriate help-seeking, and officers learn that asking for help isn't a sign that they aren't strong enough for the job.

It is a sign that they understand something every good officer already knows:

You don't have to face a difficult situation alone.